Sunday, February 20, 2011

Glitter

There are so many things going through my mind.
I usually can't even sleep.
I find comfort in music.
I really love to listen to the lyrics.
I can apply so many songs to my life and in someway I find peace.
Knowing that once someone else felt the same way I did.
Whether it be a song about being in love.
A song about forgiveness.
A song about pain.
A song about the first time you see someone.
A song about wanting what you can't have.
Even a song about losing someone you love.

I love quotes.
I love things being laid on my heart that I can explain away through the words of an old poet.
I usually find that this song or these words will not escape my mind for days.
If you know me, you know that a good quote will end up as my status or printed out and hung up.
A good song will be repeated until i no longer feel that way.
Often times I'll fall in love with a song, and then forget about.
When I find it again, while shuffling the lists on my ipod, I'm instantly taken back.
What I find humorous is when I can reapply a song from 5 years ago to my life now.
Or even 5 months ago.

Many of you know I lost a dear friend last april.
Many of you knew it was a high school friend, that I hadn't kept in close touch with.
What most of you do not know, is that this friend got me through senior year.
That this friend had been a constant thought on my mind right before she passed away.
In fact we had conversed a day before.
What many of you don't know is that I didn't so much feel pain from losing something I had.
It was losing something I didn't get the chance to have.

7 months ago, I played a song on repeat.
I made it my status.
My mom called me the next day and made sure I was ok.
7 months ago, I told my mom I wanted to come home.
I was so homesick and lonely.
She was so encouraging.
My mom was my best friend.

"Have you eve hated yourself for staring at the phone. Your whole life waiting on the ring to prove you're not alone"

My mom was that ring.

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